Grateful Acceptance: 3 Words for 2013 Check-In

Today we give thanks.  This does not mean that we are not thankful on other days of the year, but this day in our American culture we pause and reflect with a grateful heart. 

This year I am thankful for a number of things that previously I, like many, would have categorized as “little things.”  I am thankful for the ability to walk. I am thankful for warm boots in the snow, and a car that starts every morning (though I likely just jinxed myself by writing that).  I am thankful for the ability to see my book to have mobility in my fingers to be able to hold it. 

AND…

I am thankful for the kindness of strangers and for good friends who tell you want you need to hear even when it is hard.  I am thankful to be surrounded by people who love me (including my idiosyncrasies, not despite them).  There is a lot for which we can be thankful. 

This year also has taught me the important lessons of impermanence.  The Buddhist monks teach that all existence is in a state of motion or flux, and this sentiment is echoed in the Judeo-Christian experience as well in the pursuit of a union with God.

Good jobs come to an end.  Friends move across country.  Highly functioning teams break up.  The aged, the ill, and the unlucky pass away.  Children lose touch with parents.  Siblings fight.  Spouses grow apart.  People change.

There are a lot of reasons why people come and go from our lives, and more often than not those departures are painful.  Lately, I’ve tried hard to focus on the value that comes from having people in our lives, no matter for how long.  I’m calling this exercise Grateful Acceptance.  It’s about the framework, like remembering college friends I haven’t spoken with in a decade; or reflecting on kids I tutored while in AmeriCorps; or thinking about the kid who beat me up in middle school; or the guy I passed on the street…

“All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring            

I remember a morning while I was in high school; my dad and I were up running errands early on a Saturday morning.  Between stops we headed into a restaurant for breakfast.  On the way in a homeless man asked if we could spare some money so he could get something to eat.  Without missing a beat my dad said, “No, but if you would like to come in and eat with us I’ll buy your breakfast.”  I’m not sure who was more surprised the stranger or me.  And that’s what we did, on a random day in 1995. 

That day had a profound impact on my life.  It opened the door for one of the most important conversations I’ve ever had with my dad.  It allowed me to see, first hand, the lesson that “we never know how much of an impact the little things we do will have on people.”  It allowed me to see love in action.  

So today, I am thankful for those who have shown great love through small acts of service.   I am grateful for all of the people who are and have been a part of my life, because every one has helped me become the man I am today. 

And for that, I am truly thankful. 

http://catholicgentleman.net

9 Months Ago, I Couldn't Walk

9 months ago I couldn’t walk.  My ankle was shattered and I was awaiting the first of my two surgeries to put it back together. 

Today, I ran up three flights of stairs to get from the basement to my office. 

9 months ago, I was married, but in a relationship that was destructive, unhealthy and in which neither party was very happy.

Today, I am divorced, but I’m seeing a woman who has restored my faith that people are as kind, loving and understanding as I know they can be. 

 9 months ago, my family was a group of people I loved very much, and saw as often as possible. 

Today, my family is still my family.  But I realize now, that without their love and support, I might not be here.  (Literally, in one sense, as my parents and youngest sister were the ones that found me in the back yard when I broke my ankle.)  On another level they have been the backbone of support during my physical and emotional recovery. 

It’s no secret that over the past 9 months I’ve been hurt, angry and frustrated over what has happened.  No one looks forward to a major injury or a divorce or any type of traumatic event – yet we all suffer.   Like most who known deep pain it’s easy to get sucked into focusing on the dark side of events.  [Change, fear, betrayal, misfortune, misery, self-pity, self-loathing, guilt, shame, just to name a few.]

In addition to those feelings of pain and suffering, I have also known tremendous gratitude and humility as I’ve been able to rely on my parents, brothers, sisters (including sisters-in-laws), as well as busloads of extended family, adopted family, and friends both old and new. 

In a recent blog post on The Art of Manliness, Brett and Kate McKay speak of the importance of a family culture.  I couldn’t agree more.  My parents built our family into a team, a unit, a group that – even though we don’t all agree with each other all the time – have each other’s back without fail.  The McKay’s identified three pillars of creating a family culture: 1.) Values, 2.) Norms, and 3.) Rituals / Traditions.  I can see each of these elements in my own family growing up.  It is those value, norms, and traditions that have helped me through the most difficult times over the past year. 

General George Patton said that, “No man is unafraid in battle, but discipline produces in him a form of vicarious courage.” 

Life has felt like a battlefield over the past 9 months (longer if I’m totally honest with myself) and it has been the discipline I learned in my parents’ household, which has allowed me to stand resolute and continue on.  At my core, I know who and what I am, which itself is a direct product of how I grew up.  Even when we are shaken to that core by forces beyond our control, the core does not crack.

9 months ago, life seemed pretty up in the air and terrifying.

Today, life still seems up in the air, but I am grounded and encouraged every day by the fundamentals that remain true:  People are genuinely good.   With the support of family and friends you can survive anything.  Whatever doesn't kill you, has to make you stronger (if it didn't make you stronger you'd be dead).  

It may sound morbid, to end on this note, but I hope you can see that there is hope here.  A hope that has been somewhat absent for quite a while, but has finally found it's way home.

This post is dedicated to my parents, brothers and sisters.  I really couldn't have made it this far without you.  Thanks. 

There and Back Again, and Again, and Again

I choose to embrace my geek side.   If that bothers you, it’s probably best to stop reading now.  It’s only going to get worse.

To date, I have read The Hobbit in excess of twenty-five times.  Each read brings out something different for me.  At first, it was just a great story with heroic characters.  Then in middle school, I saw myself as Bilbo Baggins – a pudgy, timid, character who had more to offer than anyone expected – including himself.   Through that lens the book became a tale of hope.  Each subsequent reading uncovered some new insight, pearl of wisdom or subtle humor that further endeared me to the story. 

Rereading the book in anticipation of the film release I discovered sympathy for the character of Thorin Oakenshield.  A leader vested with the responsibility of leading his people, yet a character in pain after suffering a great loss.  At his core, Thorin is driven by a desire for justice and a good heart.  His focus to look out for his company, his team, was so great that it almost led to their collective demise.  Tunnel vision that becomes attachment, which then crosses into obsession is not all that uncommon in how we operate in the professional setting.  Tolkien calls it the dragon sickness, now we mostly call it drive or ambition.  When infected by this sickness achieving the objective or completing the mission becomes our focus – at any cost.  Results matter more than methods. 

We are called to do more, to be more.  Completing checklists and accomplishing goals possess no more inherently “bad” qualities than does being rich or successful. It is in the pursuit of these objectives and conditions surrounding them, which brings the moral imperative into question. 

Author and Aikido Master, Terry Dobson addressed the roots of this problem in his book Aikido in Everyday Life. 

“There’s nothing wrong with winning, provided that what you are winning is a contest.  The problem…is that, over the years, we’ve let the win/lose frame of reference shift into areas of our lives that are not contests.   [We’ve] bought into an imaginary, arbitrary system where everything’s a contest and there are no ties—just sudden-death play-offs and a long walk to the showers.” 

Within the metaphor of The Hobbit, Thorin too was blinded by the prize.  His focus, his greed, ruined relationships and ultimately cost him his life – though not without an 11^th hour conversion.  Whether intentional or not, the story of the Dwarf-Kings mania speaks loudly as a cautionary tale. 

In our own professional lives it’s easy to let one more project, one more sale, one more case closed, one more patient served drag us deeper down the rabbit hole.  Not that any of these things are bad, but when their pursuit chokes out others aspects of our character, ethic and humanity then we really have a problem.  

Blue Monday: The Soundtrack of Our Lives

One of the unexpected developments during my two tours in Charleston was a new found love of live music – especially the Blues.   From 2003-2005 I lived in a city with nightlife for the first time in my life.  This was also my first real exposure to live music at every turn.  Charleston is a great city for performers and artists.  Great music is tucked into the nooks and crannies that pepper King, Queen, Market, and High Street.   Cover bands, jazz, rock, reggae, country, and the Blues provided an eclectic soundtrack for my two years in Chuck-town. 

My favorite club, however, was Mama’s Blues Palace on John Street.  The house band Mama & the Misfits was the lovechild of a pair of retired schoolteachers.  Mama and Papa Dupree, their son Jo-Jo, and a group of some of the most talented artists I’ve ever heard blew the roof off that club every weekend.  My friends and I made it a point to check out the show at Mama’s as often as we could. 

It was in that dingy little blues bar on John Street, where we met Del Rae, a jazz singer, piano player, and composer.   Del, who famously hated Stevie Wonder for beating her out for ‘song of the year’ at some point in the late 70’s, was standing the warm up act.  Well into her 80’s by the time we met her, she warmed up the house for an hour every Thursday thru Saturday. 

After her set she’d visit with us early birds and let us buy her a drink.  She was a great old lady.  She was one classy lady (unless you got her talking about Stevie Wonder).  Over the course of our visits, Del taught us that music had to come from the soul, and as long as you had music you could live a long and happy life. 

Mama’s Blues Palace closed in 2004, while I was home for a visit so I missed the last show.  The Misfits broke up, and Mama only rarely played during the last year of my assignment in Charleston.  I am happy to report though, that Mama, Papa Dupree and Jojo are back performing in the clubs of South Carolina under the new name of Mama & The Redemption Band. 

There is an impermanence of life that forces us or allows us to change, adapt and evolve – that’s true in the Blues as well.  No one sings about being blue, always being blue, and staying blue forever.  The Blues are about transitions.  Times were good, now they’re not.  Times are bad, but tomorrow will be better.  I’m suffering, but I have my guitar so it could be worse.   That’s why we come back to the blues, because we are always in transition.   Riding the wild rollercoaster of life, and jamming the entire way.  

Mama and The Redemption Band (formerly Mama & The Misfits)




***NOTE:  I have not had much luck finding any of Del Rae's music (at least not the Del we met).  If anyone is able to point me in the right direction to songs either written or recorded by Del, I would be most grateful.  We have her picture and an autograph -- but I'd like to hear her sing again.  Thanks, NTS.

Power of Language

Words have power.

Spoken or written, it makes no difference.  The right words, arranged in the right way, delivered at the right time can begin a ripple the swells to a riptide.   Don't believe me; think about the last book you read that really spoke to you.  In the hands of a gifted writer we can experience suspense and horror (Stephen King) or humor and love. 

The artful use of language the ability to inspire such strong emotions in both the creator and audience it is wise to respect its natural force.  It's because of this power that we tend to fear words and how they are used.  

Writing takes guts.

Ask anyone who's ever written a piece that they care about, and if they're honest with you a little part of them self went into that composition.  Once words emerge from our brain, either as speech or written copy, the corresponding thoughts are out there.  Permanently in the public domain to be evaluated, judged, and criticized -- all experiences that most people avoid.  

The year that my marriage started to unravel my writing took a turn to abstraction.  What little autobiographical writing I produced dried up, perhaps for fear that if it is written so it shall be done.  I became hyper-focused on the few positive moments and messages of hope.  All this, to no avail as the end result did not spare any pain.  The words were not at fault, however, despite how much I feared them. 

For all the damage that words can do, there is equal opportunity for words to usher in kindness, healing and love.  The scene from V for Vendetta comes to my mind, when Evey finds the note scribbled on the pieces of toilet paper from the former resident of her cell, Valarie.  At her breaking point simple words of truth and kindness are enough to set Evey free.  Inspired by those words she finds the strength to face her fears.

Power can be used for good or ill.  

As writers, readers, and communicators let’s all take a moment to think about the words that we use, misuse, and abuse on a regular basis.  We’re all guilty of being sloppy with words, “If you do that again I’m going to kick your….”  Seriously, how many of us have followed through with that threat.   Sometimes, however, it’s the words that we don’t say that hurt the most.  A few words of encouragement (even scribbled on a piece of toilet paper) may be what someone needs at that moment in time.  You never know. 

"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny."—    Lao-Tze

Blue Monday: Ramble On

This song kicks ass. 

I really was hoping for a much more eloquent opening line.  I tried, but they all seemed flat, and fake.  After several revisions, however, this one just seemed to fit.  It’s honest and exactly what I would say to you if we were talking about music face to face.   Ramble On just simply strikes a chord with me on so many levels. 

For my money, this is Led Zeppelin, at it’s best. 

There is a musical purity that exists with the way this song was constructed and performed.  It reminds me of summer car rides with my dad and brothers with the windows down and the radio up.  Very happy memories.

The lyrics are poetry.

Beyond my utter joy in the Tolkien reference in verse 3, the lyrics possess an epic quality.  They tell a story, a story with which we can all relate – searching, questing, craving freedom. 

Each time I hear this song it speaks to me.

Sometimes our only functional strategy in life is to “ramble on.”  Suffering is not optional, it happens.  The Gollum’s of the world sneak in and sweep away what’s precious.  It’s unfortunate and unavoidable.  This lesson is true if you are 16, 26, or 66.  

All we can do then is follow our hearts and ramble on, singing our song.

Gut Check: Writing Straight with Crooked Lines

(Note:  I’ll continue on with the Blue Monday series later, but this post seemed more timely.)

As I mentioned in my first post of 2013, words only have power if they inspire actions – and I include new ways of thinking as an action.  One of my 3 words for 2013 was guts, and it’s the word that has been most on my mind recently.  2012 presented a few more challenges than perhaps anyone had anticipated, but the darkness of struggle and suffering is the most fertile ground for seeds of hope to take root. 

Some years ago I heard a quote while on retreat that has become a mantra of sorts for me this past year.  I believe the author is Thomas Merton, and it is simply this: “God writes straight with crooked lines.”  This simple phrase has taken new meaning at various stages over the past year.  Each time it seems that I’ve arrived at a new understanding something unexpected brings me to a deeper appreciation of the sentiment. 

From my perspective, this phrase embodies the idea of guts.  Faith takes courage.  If we are to have faith in God, in life, in ourselves, and each other we must have the guts to live.  We must acknowledge that life happens, and events unfold that are out of our immediate control.  Then the idea that we cannot always see around the corners on our path (the crooked lines) becomes easier to accept.  Once we accept that there are twists and turns in our road, it becomes a little bit easier to understand that despite our fears there is forward motion. 

That’s why life is about the journey.  That’s why life is a process to be experienced.  It is through that process, as Bruce Lee explains, that we learn and grow.  “Since life is an ever-evolving process, one should flow in this process and discover how to actualize and expand oneself.”  And that’s the point - growth.

Real growth takes guts. 

Guts to take risks.

Guts to have faith.

Guts to act despite our fears.

When we have the guts to live, we become open to good things, unexpected things – and there we often find joy. 

As Lent comes to an end; as we move forward along our path; as we encounter new people and experiences – let us all recommit to having the guts to live our lives, to have faith in the goodness of one another, and appreciate the crooked lines.

Blue Monday, Part I: Soulshine

When I was getting ready to go to college my cousin Steve took me on a road trip to Chicago.  That trip started a tradition of mini-pilgrimages focused on good food and the Blues.  For each subsequent trip a new Blues Mix or Playlist was created specifically to introduce me to a new artist, song, style or writer.  

It was on those trips that caught the Blues. 

Building on this newfound interest, my dad introduced me to Duke Tumatoe & The PowerTrio a local group with a great sound.  Then he shared his collection of Kenny Wayne Shepard, Stevie Ray Vaughn, ZZ Top, Eric Clapton, and B.B. King.   Not all of these are strictly Blues, but Dad helped me to see that they all influence one another.  Seeing this connection helped me deepen my love of the genre.  

Last weekend, Steve and I continued the tradition after a long hiatus, and fell right back into our pattern.   This time, however, I was able to contribute a little more to the conversation as I’ve become a little better versed in the Blues than I was at 18. 

One of the songs, I heard for the first time this weekend was Soulshine, by Warren Haynes (Allman Brothers Band and Gov’t Mule).  This song has it all.  Well written and performed with all of the soul you’d expect from a performer of Haynes’ caliber.   I think that’s what I love about the Blues, the soul.  It’s hard to fake the feelings, the pain, the suffering.  It’s hard to fake the Blues.     

A friend once asked how I could listen to all of that depressing music all the time.  The Blues aren’t really about the dark and the sad.  The Blues talk about on pain and suffering, but often times the song is about survival, making it through the pain and suffering of life.   The Blues are about the hope for better days. 

The Blues are about the power of the soul to shine through the darkness.  It’s about soulshine.  Better than sunshine, better than moonshine, and damn sure better than rain.

"Now you got to let your soul shine,

Just like my daddy used to say.

He used to say soulshine,

It's better than sunshine,

It's better than moonshine,

Damn sure better than rain.

Yeah now people don't mind,

We all get this way sometime,

Got to let your soul shine, shine till the break of day."

~Warren Haynes

Soulshine video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nf0BNlYY_RA

Carolina On My Mind

This is not a post about James Taylor.  This is a post about Thursday.  In the AmeriCorps*NCCC world it’s Team Leader Thursday.  Normally I wouldn’t devote an entire blog post something I got from a Facebook post, but today it stuck with me.  

I had a great Team Leader (TL).  Jen Karmels built our team around the values of patience, flexibility, and a healthy sense of humor.  But it was her presence that helped us become a highly functional and cohesive unit.  When we suffered, she suffered.  When we need a friend, a mentor, a ride to the doctor or a swift kick to get us back on track, Jen was right there.  Even these many years later and miles apart Jen remains a presence in our lives. 

Author, poet and Buddhist Monk, Thich Nhat Hanh says that, “the most precious gift we can offer others is our presence.”  In this world of overburdened attention spans, jam packed schedules, and an addictive tendency to try and do everything – we loose sight of this profound truth. 

Earlier this morning I learned that my teammate Rosa’s sister passed away last weekend.  I cannot imagine the sense of loss that their family must be going through.  But I know Rosa, and her parents.  I know that in the days and weeks to come they will be reflecting on the good times they had with Ana.  In this context presence takes on an entirely new meaning and perhaps urgency. 

Presence is one of my 3 words for 2013, but being present is a practice that can be beneficial to all.  So on this Thursday, let us take a moment to be present to one another.  Hug your kids, spend time with your family, call a friend who you’ve been meaning to talk to for a while, take a risk and offer a kind word to a stranger.   But do something to reach out.  In the end, it’s those moments in which we are present for one another that stay with us.  

"Today is a gift, that's why it's called the present" Master Oogway

http://youtu.be/Znnj1oFxCR

My thoughts and prayers go out to Rosa, Ana and the entire Strandemo family.

Nun of Your Business

This afternoon NPR aired a piece by Heidi Glenn called Losing Our Religion: the Growth of the‘Nones.’  The long and short of the piece is that more American’s are choosing to not identify with one of the major established organized religions.   My first reaction after reading the piece was, “duh!”  Followed closely, by the urge to bury any fledgling ideas for this post in the shed out back and forget about it. 

However, one of my words for 2013 is guts, and we’re all going to need some to have this conversation.  Because that’s what I am convinced the Pew Study is referencing, a national (and perhaps worldwide) conversation that involves the entire human family. 

“Religion is like a knife: you can either use it to cut bread, or stick in someone's back.”   Desmond Tutu

There is a bad taste in people’s mouth regarding religion. Leaders of various organized religious groups turn out to be corrupt, dishonest, selfish, dangerous, or worse and people lose faith.  Too often religion is used for cutting down our opponents, rather than providing a common ground for dialogue.  But religion is the human institution, made up of human beings, and therefore subject to human flaws and shortcomings.  

As one who is an active member of a traditional organized religion, I struggle when church scandals take place.  I am saddened and frustrated when religious leaders make statements, which I believe are counter to the accepting and forgiving spirit of the faith.  For these concerns there are internal dialogues, which must be held to enact changes here too, but that’s a topic for another post. 

Please understand, that I’m not encouraging or justifying why more people are walking away from religion.  I believe that faith is a fundamental element for wholeness and provides unique gifts and insights into the world.  But in order to start talking about solutions, we must identify some of the problems.  After reading the NPR article and the Pew Research, there are a couple of pieces that the authors missed. 

People are tired.  It’s been my experience that people are just tired of the perceived judgment that comes along with most religion.  Whether from official leadership or zealots down the pew, most Westerners are done with petty judgments.  And I can't say that I blame anyone who has reached this point.  

Religions change at a glacial pace.  Most major religions are struggling to meet people where they are.  Many groups try to apply old models to a new generation of people who are used to a user-centered instant update approach.  When they don’t find what they want, people walk.  This attitude is not all that dissimilar to the “lack of customer loyalty” cited in business discussions.    This capitalism of religion means that if a religion says something I don’t like then I’ll go across the street to someone else.

People don’t need religion to function in society.  The role of religion as a functional element of daily life has diminished.  1,000 years ago your religion determined your worldview, but it also had strong influence on where you lived, what profession you held, when you worked, who you did business with, and served as a persons fundamental social and cultural identity.  The rise of nationalism brought competition with religion for our loyalty, but even then religion maintained influence.  100 years ago a person’s religious affiliation determined an individual’s place in the community and their social circles.  Today, to many, religion is a checkbox on a form, a line on the online bio, and a place you go for an hour a week.   The schism between religion and secular aspects of our life is so complete that a person can function without religion and notice very little societal impact.

Religion, for all it's faults is not the faith.  Religion is not the spirit of the movement.   

Religion can (and often does) serve as the embodiment of the ideas of a faith tradition.  When members of the Red Crescent or Magen David Adom bring relief to those in greatest need - religion becomes the hand of God.  When Nuns, Brothers, Priests and ministers bring reconciliation, comfort, and healing into prisons and communities who have known violence - religion becomes the face of God.  When groups from churches, temples, mosques, and synagogues reach out to the surrounding neighborhood to build community - religion becomes the family of God.  

I think that if we all exercised a little more compassion and understanding, that the major religions would have an easier time connecting with people.  All across the board, we can all get a little better about meeting people where they are.  And if we do that, we may just start seeing some progress.     

This post really doesn’t answer the big questions, but I hope it starts or continues or in some way benefits the conversation.  

“I really feel that some people neglect and overlook compassion because they associate it with religion. Of course, everyone is free to choose whether they pay religion any regard, but to neglect compassion is a mistake because it is the source of our own well-being.”  The Dalai Lama                  

(Come on, you know I had to do it)

My 3 words for 2013

New Year’s resolutions have always seemed so fake to me. I am not sure that I know a single person who has set such a goal and stuck to it for the entire year. Life has a way of disrupting our schedules, injuries divert us from a workout program, and travel impedes our attempts to eat healthier. Pretty soon the resolution is out the window and it’s back to business as usual. To me, change has to be more organic in order to be lasting; because lets face it change is hard.

“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” Albert Einstein

Author/blogger Mitch Joel at “Six Pixels of Separation” turned me onto Chris Brogan’s practice of identifying “3 Words” for the year. These three words then serve as motivation and guidelines for all that you do during the year. Brogan, explains it like this, “In an effort to tell bigger stories, I've found that the concept of three words allows me to think in more dimensions about what I want to do with my life and it lets me apply lots of tangible goals instead of what most people do when they focus on just a finite task.”

Here goes nothing.

One of the dangers in posting goals like this online is that they are written down (pressure) and they are public (more pressure). Don’t get me wrong, not all pressure is bad, sometimes we do our very best work when being held accountable, but it’s pressure all the same. After two days of distilling a list, I am ready to unveil my list for this year.

My 3 words for 2013:

1.  Simplify. While serving in AmeriCorps*NCCC, I learned to live with less. For months at a time my teams traveled with little more that what could fit in a red fire pack. Both physical and mental clutter detracts from my ability to live the life I want. There is just too much stuff getting in the way: At work there are papers and memos that need to be dealt with and filed or tossed. At home boxes full of old college papers and unassembled models make our office less of a workspace and more of a warehouse. Internally, there’s a great deal of mental noise, which impedes a persons ability to concentrate, pray, and focus. By trying to simplify there is an opportunity to do fewer (quantity) things better (quality).


2.  Presence. When you get down to it, most of us are busy. So busy, in fact, that we often forget to enjoy life. I have been places and focused so much on taking pictures and journaling about the adventure that I nearly missed the experience. I live a few minutes drive from several family and friends, yet see them about as often as when I lived across the state. To be present, means to be mindful of where I am and what I am doing. To be present to those I am with, instead of thinking of all that “needs” to get done. To focus completely on the task at hand and resisting the urge to follow the squirrels of other ideas as they scamper across my train of thought.


3.  Guts. I love this word. It reminds me of the action heroes from the 80’s and 90’s. They had guts. The pushed the limits and lived with the consequences. At least that’s how I remember them. Almost everyone falls into a routine, which can lead to complacency. It’s important to continually push the limits. Having gust means: taking risks; writing with courage; saying and doing what needs to be said and done because it is right. It means committing to something and not be ashamed of what we’ve committed to. Having guts means putting ourselves out there with honesty, compassion and faith. Faith in ourselves and faith that those who love us love us.

Game on.

I mentioned this exercise to a friend this afternoon who reminded me that three words are great, but only if they inspire action. Actions give words power, just as words can inspire powerful action. Regardless of which came first the relationship between words and action is essential to progress. Now that the words have been chosen, it’s time to act.

What are your 3 words for 2013?

Here are Mitch Joel's 3 words for 2013

Here are Chris Borgan's 3 words for 2013