Nun of Your Business

This afternoon NPR aired a piece by Heidi Glenn called Losing Our Religion: the Growth of the‘Nones.’  The long and short of the piece is that more American’s are choosing to not identify with one of the major established organized religions.   My first reaction after reading the piece was, “duh!”  Followed closely, by the urge to bury any fledgling ideas for this post in the shed out back and forget about it. 

However, one of my words for 2013 is guts, and we’re all going to need some to have this conversation.  Because that’s what I am convinced the Pew Study is referencing, a national (and perhaps worldwide) conversation that involves the entire human family. 

“Religion is like a knife: you can either use it to cut bread, or stick in someone's back.”   Desmond Tutu

There is a bad taste in people’s mouth regarding religion. Leaders of various organized religious groups turn out to be corrupt, dishonest, selfish, dangerous, or worse and people lose faith.  Too often religion is used for cutting down our opponents, rather than providing a common ground for dialogue.  But religion is the human institution, made up of human beings, and therefore subject to human flaws and shortcomings.  

As one who is an active member of a traditional organized religion, I struggle when church scandals take place.  I am saddened and frustrated when religious leaders make statements, which I believe are counter to the accepting and forgiving spirit of the faith.  For these concerns there are internal dialogues, which must be held to enact changes here too, but that’s a topic for another post. 

Please understand, that I’m not encouraging or justifying why more people are walking away from religion.  I believe that faith is a fundamental element for wholeness and provides unique gifts and insights into the world.  But in order to start talking about solutions, we must identify some of the problems.  After reading the NPR article and the Pew Research, there are a couple of pieces that the authors missed. 

People are tired.  It’s been my experience that people are just tired of the perceived judgment that comes along with most religion.  Whether from official leadership or zealots down the pew, most Westerners are done with petty judgments.  And I can't say that I blame anyone who has reached this point.  

Religions change at a glacial pace.  Most major religions are struggling to meet people where they are.  Many groups try to apply old models to a new generation of people who are used to a user-centered instant update approach.  When they don’t find what they want, people walk.  This attitude is not all that dissimilar to the “lack of customer loyalty” cited in business discussions.    This capitalism of religion means that if a religion says something I don’t like then I’ll go across the street to someone else.

People don’t need religion to function in society.  The role of religion as a functional element of daily life has diminished.  1,000 years ago your religion determined your worldview, but it also had strong influence on where you lived, what profession you held, when you worked, who you did business with, and served as a persons fundamental social and cultural identity.  The rise of nationalism brought competition with religion for our loyalty, but even then religion maintained influence.  100 years ago a person’s religious affiliation determined an individual’s place in the community and their social circles.  Today, to many, religion is a checkbox on a form, a line on the online bio, and a place you go for an hour a week.   The schism between religion and secular aspects of our life is so complete that a person can function without religion and notice very little societal impact.

Religion, for all it's faults is not the faith.  Religion is not the spirit of the movement.   

Religion can (and often does) serve as the embodiment of the ideas of a faith tradition.  When members of the Red Crescent or Magen David Adom bring relief to those in greatest need - religion becomes the hand of God.  When Nuns, Brothers, Priests and ministers bring reconciliation, comfort, and healing into prisons and communities who have known violence - religion becomes the face of God.  When groups from churches, temples, mosques, and synagogues reach out to the surrounding neighborhood to build community - religion becomes the family of God.  

I think that if we all exercised a little more compassion and understanding, that the major religions would have an easier time connecting with people.  All across the board, we can all get a little better about meeting people where they are.  And if we do that, we may just start seeing some progress.     

This post really doesn’t answer the big questions, but I hope it starts or continues or in some way benefits the conversation.  

“I really feel that some people neglect and overlook compassion because they associate it with religion. Of course, everyone is free to choose whether they pay religion any regard, but to neglect compassion is a mistake because it is the source of our own well-being.”  The Dalai Lama                  

(Come on, you know I had to do it)